Consumer Etiquette Part 4: Children And Their Parents

In comparison to yesterday’s installment on customers under the influence, today’s consumer group is much, much more civil. We’re talking about kids, teens and parents concerning their kids.

Kids have the tendency to be an unruly group, even when they’re by themselves. A lot of their negative behavior in the eyes of store clerks can be summed up as “they’re just kids”, whilst some kinds of behavior can be directly attributable to what their parents have (or have not) taught them. In addition, there are some things kids do in stores that just aren’t right.

The first thing that kids need to learn as soon as it’s possible to comprehend such a concept is that stores are not playgrounds. You know the way kids behave at playgrounds? Well, that’s the way many of them behave in supermarkets, when they’re there without their parents. Hide and Seek, chasing after one other, yelling, screaming, running around bumping items off the shelves. All that’s behavior that clerks witness on a daily basis, all of which are just fine at a playground but sure as hell should not be done in a grocery market.

Kids, by themselves or with other kids, can very easily be categorized into two very different groups. On one hand you have the rowdy kids who’ll run around, scream, and misbehave, maybe even with a sour attitude even at a young age. On the other hand you have kids who feel intimidated by being in a store by themselves or with other kids, mainly without their parents, especially intimidated by any older person, be it the clerks or another customer.

Let’s focus on the first group first.

The running, screaming and playing games feature of their behavior is one of the most aggravating things that we as clerks have to deal with. Those are things that kids need to be taught that there’s a time and a place for that, but stores are NOT the place for them.

Running around in a store will very quickly end up in knocking things off a shelf or running into another customer. There’s a reason we don’t allow for it in stores, and it’s common sense.

The screaming and shouting, well, please do that outside. No one wants to hear it in confined spaces. The sound of kids joyously shouting and screaming at a playground is to many a nice, peaceful sound, but only outdoors and preferably not within four walls. So please, keep your voice down and WALK, don’t run.

Another comparison to playground comes in the form of loitering. Kids always hang out at the playground, even when they get older. A supermarket, or even the grocery store around the corner from your house is not the place to be loitering about. Those chairs you sit on and eat your ice cream are meant for people who actually need to sit down. What really gets on my nerves is having to keep tabs on which kid has bought what, because when loitering they love to walk back and forth past the cash register, with the candy bar or bottle of soda that they’ve bought. Just more unnecessary work for us.

The reason why we have to keep an eye out for the kids and what they’ve bought is because of shoplifting. There’s actually more of that than you would believe. I’ve seen an 11yr old girl being caught stealing 30some euros worth of sunglasses, just to give an example. That being said, remember back to when you were a kid. Is there a chance that you might have at one point or another stolen a candy bar or something like that? Yeah, kids steal stuff. It’s fun and adventurous. When you’re a kid. Not when you’re a clerk having to look out for these kinds of things. One very common scam made by kids is with pick ‘n’ mix candy. It’s so simple. Put candy in a bag, weigh it, then add some more candy, and go pay for the first price. Happens a lot. Some kids just aren’t that smart about it, or just plain greedy. A clerk will quickly learn the correlation between the weight of the candy bag and the price it should be. Oh, and just as a reminder, a candy bar in the pick ‘n’ mix candy bag kinda stands out…

All I really have to say to kids who try to pull this kind of things with the clerks is to remember that we were kids once as well. We know your schemes… =)

The shy and timid kids are a better consumer group, mainly because they actually seem afraid of the clerks. We’re not the boogeyman or anything… There’s no reason to be afraid of us. Then again, I do prefer that kind of behavior to running, screaming, stealing and just plain being obnoxious.

Above all, there are three things that kids do in stores that are pretty much guaranteed to drive any clerk bonkers:
1) Kids dealing with money. Many kids just throw the money on the table and then immediately, impatiently, extend their arm in your face, waiting for the change. That’s a whole lot more annoying than kids coming to the checkout counter with a bag of small change.
2) Playing with every item in the store. Newsflash! It’s not your room! The items on the shelves are not toys, no matter how inviting they are. Do have to say that by far the most annoying thing kids do is play with items which makes sounds or play jingles. You can test it out once, fine, but you don’t have to play them ALL, ALL the time, one after the other. One kid’s not that bad, but it’s never just one kid, it’s always many.
3) Not understanding the meaning of “No”. If you’re a kid in a store, and you misbehave, we’ll first tell you to stop. The next time we’ll tell you to stop or you’re out of the store. The third time you do THE SAME ANNOYING THING, we’ve had it. You’re out, and staying out. We might even tell your parents about it.

Speaking of parents, all three things I just outlined above, as well as many of the other things above them, also apply to adults. Oh, and teens as well.

Teenagers are not exactly the best customer group. They’re really just kids who look older. Many of the things that apply to kids apply to them as well, namely the loitering, the running, the screaming…

All of the same rules apply to teens as do for kids. It’s not your playground or place to hang around and do what you wish. But, being older, teens do have a few more liberties (read: more nuisances for the clerks).

One of the main liberties is the chance to buy alcohol and cigarettes (required age depending on the country). This is at the same time one of the most annoying things we have to deal with and also one of the few times we get to make the customer feel uncomfortable.

According to the law (again, depending on the country), all young people buying alcohol or cigarettes must present valid identification in order for the clerk to verify their age. Again, it’s the law, and we could lose our job and/or get fined if we sell alcohol or cigarettes to underage kids. With that in mind, anyone who seems, looks, appears, or acts like a teenager will be ID’d.

The excuses I’ve heard from teens trying to buy alcohol or cigarettes when being ID’d could cover volumes. The most typical one is “I forgot my ID at home”, but some are more creative, such as “But my birthday’s next Monday and I want to celebrate it now when it’s the weekend” and “I’m buying these for my dad, he sent me”. Ok, not that creative. My absolute favourite response to being ID’d was this kid asking me “Why?” when I asked for ID. Nevertheless, the bottom line is that if you appear young, you will be ID’d, and once we ask for ID, we won’t sell until we see that valid ID proving you’re above the legal age.

Oh, and here’s one thing teens don’t understand. If you’re of legal age to purchase alcohol or cigarettes, but your friends are not, leave them far from the store. We will ID ALL of you, and if even one of your group is not of legal age to purchase, we’re not selling to you.

Teens these days suffer from a severe case of possessing an attitude problem. Thinking you’re tough or that you’re cool won’t fly with clerks, so please, check your attitude at the door when you enter the premises. Remember, it doesn’t make you any less “cool” to say “Hi!” or “Thank You!”…

Finally, we reach the parental units. Most of the instances and behaviors I’ve outlined above can be very easily avoided with good, proper, parental guidance. When your children, be they kids or teens, are in a store by themselves, there’s a good chance that they will behave differently from the way they behave when with their parents in a store.

There have been a few times when I’ve barred several kids from the store I’ve been working at, mainly for doing many of the Don’ts I’ve outlined above, no matter how often the other clerks and I tell them to stop. Furthermore, I’ve once had to explain to a mother why her angelic little boy isn’t allowed into the store anymore.

If your kid get’s barred from a store, there’s usually a very good reason for it. Your little angel might not actually be as angelic as you previously thought. Unless you think that we’ve made a terrible mistake and can prove it, don’t come screaming bloody murder at us. We’re just doing our job.

As parents, you not only have the responsibility to teach you kids how to behave, but you also have the responsibilily to demonstrate that proper behavior. If you’re a nuisance of a customer, so will your kids be too. Control you kids when in a store. Show them how to behave. Make sure they don’t run around and pull stuff off the shelves.

Above all, if you’re kids are giving you a hard time and a killer headache, there’s no reason to infect us with it. You’re an adult and you should know how to behave and act. Just because your kids are pissing you off doesn’t give you the right to treat the clerks like dirt.

So parents, please, educate your kids, from an early age, how to behave when in a store. Remind them that it’s not their playground, it’s a place of business. The way you yourself behave in a store is a huge contributing factor to how they will behave in a similar setting. Remember that kids like to mimic their parents’ behavior, either consciously or subconsciously. The change and the social education begins at an early age, but it’s crucial that you yourself, as a parent, know how to behave in a store first. Otherwise your kids will learn the wrong way to behave, and we don’t want that, do we?

[<---Go To Part 3]
[Go To Part 5--->]

Part Zero: Introduction [16.08.2007]
Part One: What You Might Not Know [17.08.2007]
Part Two: Everyday People [18.08.2007]
Part Three: Under The Influence [19.08.2007]
Part Four: Children And Their Parents [20.08.2007]
Part Five: Senior Citizens [21.08.2007]
Part Six: Animals [22.08.2007]
Part Seven: Disorderly Conduct [23.08.2007]
Part Eight: Tips And Hints [24.08.2007]
Part Nine: For The Workers [25.08.2007]
Part Ten: Summary [26.08.2007]

If you have any comments, experiences or additions to this post, please leave a comment! Thank you in advance!